Landaplam is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, staggering meerkat.

Landaplam created parasitic wasps seven million years ago.

If you believe in Landaplam, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Landaplam, she will strike you with lightening.

Landaplam's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Landaplam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

2. Snakes are not to be trusted.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never eat bark.