Gigyasstom is a god.

He takes the form of a small, conceited fly.

Gigyasstom created an electron three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gigyasstom, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Gigyasstom, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Gigyasstom's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Gigyasstom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear gray clothing.

2. Hide from turquoise pigs for they are unholy.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Always help porpoises.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.