Arpstipcad is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, humorless hedgehog.

Arpstipcad created the world three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpstipcad, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Arpstipcad, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Arpstipcad's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Arpstipcad's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five tapirs approach from the east.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Arpstipcad.

5. Never mention mice.