Sawsas is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, unsympathetic zebra.

Sawsas created energy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sawsas, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Sawsas, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Sawsas' most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Sawsas' Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat bread.

2. Never talk about stars.

3. Sawsas loves cats, so they must be respected.

4. Never go into black rooms.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.