Bastvonfat is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, omniscient hyena.

Bastvonfat created a quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Bastvonfat, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Bastvonfat, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Bastvonfat's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Bastvonfat's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always make sure there are no horses in a room before entering it.

3. Always obey Bastvonfat's priests.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate moths.

5. Do not listen to music.