Lipgutved is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, temperamental narwhal.

Lipgutved created water two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lipgutved, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Lipgutved, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Lipgutved's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Lipgutved's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat moths with great respect.

2. Do not wear carbon on your body.

3. Do not take Lipgutved's name in vain.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.