Fotbepgar Tifmanapp is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, merciful manatee.

Fotbepgar Tifmanapp created Europe four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fotbepgar Tifmanapp, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Fotbepgar Tifmanapp, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Fotbepgar Tifmanapp's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Fotbepgar Tifmanapp's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never go into indigo rooms.

3. Never run in holy places.

4. You must love Fotbepgar Tifmanapp.

5. Never think about asteroids.