Timbemdog is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unsympathetic duck.

Timbemdog created the Sun eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Timbemdog, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Timbemdog, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Timbemdog's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Timbemdog's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry whales.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never mention snails.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never eat onions.