Batbigcuss is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, impressive dugong.

Batbigcuss created the planet Mars three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Batbigcuss, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Batbigcuss, she will be mildly annoyed.

Batbigcuss' most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Batbigcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Put Batbigcuss first in all things.

2. Never wear turquoise shorts.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never write about nebulae.

5. Never hurt squirrels.