Midkikjonfab is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, ill-tempered badger.

Midkikjonfab created vertebrates three million years ago.

If you believe in Midkikjonfab, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Midkikjonfab, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Midkikjonfab's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Midkikjonfab's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in holy places.

2. Never wear skirts.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always stare at clouds.