Teenhenbam is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, humane unicorn.

Teenhenbam created the solar system nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Teenhenbam, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Teenhenbam, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Teenhenbam's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Teenhenbam's Holy Commandments

1. Doves are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never sing in holy places.

3. Never hurt goats.

4. Never jump near squirrels.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate sharks.