Garzagtetti is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, annoying shark.

Garzagtetti created an electron three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Garzagtetti, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Garzagtetti, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Garzagtetti's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Garzagtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt ducks.

2. Never talk about galaxies.

3. Erect five nickel sculptures of Garzagtetti on top of important buildings.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.