Kamfligkip is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, charitable raccoon.

Kamfligkip created a photon two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kamfligkip, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Kamfligkip, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Kamfligkip's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Kamfligkip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kamfligkip.

3. Never think ill of sick sheep.

4. You must never eat corn.

5. Never look at black holes.