Fasdisskab Witvegquam Kanfatbog is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, passionate warg.

Fasdisskab Witvegquam Kanfatbog created Asia six billion years ago.

If you believe in Fasdisskab Witvegquam Kanfatbog, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Fasdisskab Witvegquam Kanfatbog, it will not invite you to parties.

Fasdisskab Witvegquam Kanfatbog's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Fasdisskab Witvegquam Kanfatbog's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if seven porpoises approach from the south.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Always make sure there are no eagles in a building before entering it.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Fasdisskab Witvegquam Kanfatbog loves nematodes, so they must be honoured.