Wotvonwig is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, witless dove.

Wotvonwig created the planet Venus five million years ago.

If you believe in Wotvonwig, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Wotvonwig, he will destroy your home planet.

Wotvonwig's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Wotvonwig's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Wotvonwig must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never eat green fruit.