Gigladstig is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, emotional giraffe.

Gigladstig created the Sun eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gigladstig, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Gigladstig, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Gigladstig's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Gigladstig's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear white.

2. Always help shrews in need.

3. Do not shave your neck.

4. Never eat lemons.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.