Likzodvin is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, annoying slug.

Likzodvin created tapeworms nine million years ago.

If you believe in Likzodvin, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Likzodvin, he will not invite you to parties.

Likzodvin's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Likzodvin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in red rooms.

2. Never wear turquoise shorts.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Always treat hamsters with great respect.

5. Never talk about fire.