Lapsugbass is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unjust swan.

Lapsugbass created Africa three million years ago.

If you believe in Lapsugbass, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lapsugbass, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Lapsugbass' most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Lapsugbass' Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt turtles.

2. Never wear corsets.

3. Never think about amino acids.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

5. You must pray to Lapsugbass six times a day.