Wonlopqueeg is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, ill-tempered dragon.

Wonlopqueeg created oxygen two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wonlopqueeg, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Wonlopqueeg, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Wonlopqueeg's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Wonlopqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from red frogs, for they are unholy.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Erect seven carbon sculptures of Wonlopqueeg on top of important buildings.

4. Hide if five cats approach from the west.

5. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.