Venkinmat is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, blissful octopus.

Venkinmat created the planet Venus eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Venkinmat, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Venkinmat, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Venkinmat's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Venkinmat's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Venkinmat.

2. Erect a large iron sculpture of Venkinmat on top of all buildings.

3. Never write about cell theory.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never talk about fire.