Sasbatsasbaf is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, dishonest dragonfly.

Sasbatsasbaf created Asia eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sasbatsasbaf, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Sasbatsasbaf, he will boil you in a big pot.

Sasbatsasbaf's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Sasbatsasbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat cucumbers.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.