Dossvogcep is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, fussy duck.

Dossvogcep created the Cigar Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dossvogcep, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Dossvogcep, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Dossvogcep's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Dossvogcep's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about comets.

2. Dossvogcep must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.