Yamjatbab is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, all-powerful snake.

Yamjatbab created the Large Magellanic Cloud four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yamjatbab, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Yamjatbab, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Yamjatbab's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Yamjatbab's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your chest violet.

2. Never wear boots.

3. Birds are not to be trusted.

4. Never run near eagles.

5. Do not drink alcohol.