Ranfumfundum is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, deceitful rhinoceros.

Ranfumfundum created the planet Jupiter nine million years ago.

If you believe in Ranfumfundum, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ranfumfundum, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Ranfumfundum's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Ranfumfundum's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never talk about amino acids.

3. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

4. Never paint your hands pink.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.