Tarfasbem is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, competent cat.

Tarfasbem created the Large Magellanic Cloud four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tarfasbem, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Tarfasbem, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Tarfasbem's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Tarfasbem's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate rats.

2. Never mention frogs.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always treat ants with great respect.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.