Limtaplin is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, witless coyote.

Limtaplin created the Sun eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Limtaplin, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Limtaplin, she will be very sad.

Limtaplin's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Limtaplin's Holy Commandments

1. Never run near tapirs.

2. Always make sure there are no whales in a room before entering it.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never eat green fruit.