Tadgetgep is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, happy rhinoceros.

Tadgetgep created snails two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tadgetgep, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tadgetgep, he will refuse to believe in you.

Tadgetgep's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Tadgetgep's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Otters are not to be trusted.

3. Never feed lentils to tapirs while wearing yellow jumpers.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Always pray immersed in water.