Konqueeg is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, omnipotent frog.

Konqueeg created Africa six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Konqueeg, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Konqueeg, she will turn you into a puffin.

Konqueeg's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Konqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry cats.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not shave your head.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate pigs.

5. Do not hurt ants.