Dabnelflan is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, caring porpoise.

Dabnelflan created matter six billion years ago.

If you believe in Dabnelflan, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Dabnelflan, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Dabnelflan's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Dabnelflan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt porpoises.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Never eat rice.

4. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a building before entering it.

5. Do not drink water in black rooms.