Konpomfas is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, awe-inspiring guinea pig.

Konpomfas created the Black Eye Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Konpomfas, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Konpomfas, she will turn you into a goat.

Konpomfas' most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Konpomfas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Do not drink water in orange rooms.