Kabvensin is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, astonishing mink.

Kabvensin created humankind three billion years ago.

If you believe in Kabvensin, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Kabvensin, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Kabvensin's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Kabvensin's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Do not take Kabvensin's name in vain.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not commit murder.