Yatshavbit is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, thoughtless tapir.

Yatshavbit created a Higgs boson two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yatshavbit, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Yatshavbit, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Yatshavbit's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Yatshavbit's Holy Commandments

1. Mites are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Yatshavbit.

5. Hide if eight squirrels approach from the east.