Butcapsadarmnad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, flying turtle.

Butcapsadarmnad created snails four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Butcapsadarmnad, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Butcapsadarmnad, it will denounce you as a heretic.

Butcapsadarmnad's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Butcapsadarmnad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about doves.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Always help horses in need.

4. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

5. Do not shave your chest.