Kikflamstaf Gepbombig is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, self-assured faun.

Kikflamstaf Gepbombig created dark matter two years ago.

If you believe in Kikflamstaf Gepbombig, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kikflamstaf Gepbombig, he will not invite you to parties.

Kikflamstaf Gepbombig's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Kikflamstaf Gepbombig's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry shrews.

2. Do not wear titanium on your body.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Always make sure there are no moths in a room before entering it.

5. Never go into purple rooms.