Hamyiknan is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, boastful jaguar.

Hamyiknan created Asia eight million years ago.

If you believe in Hamyiknan, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Hamyiknan, it will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Hamyiknan's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Hamyiknan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Hide if eight ants approach from the east.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Hamyiknan loves bats, so they must be respected.