Yarpguplak is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unjust alligator.

Yarpguplak created time and space nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Yarpguplak, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Yarpguplak, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Yarpguplak's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Yarpguplak's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed gooseberries to dogs while wearing gray shirts.

2. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

3. Do not hurt mites.

4. Do not take Yarpguplak's name in vain.

5. Pray towards the north.