Nellfuncin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, all-knowing dryad.

Nellfuncin created matter nine million years ago.

If you believe in Nellfuncin, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Nellfuncin, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Nellfuncin's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Nellfuncin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat pineapples.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Nellfuncin on top of all buildings.

5. Always take life seriously.