Flatvonkyost is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, compassionate sheep.

Flatvonkyost created silver seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flatvonkyost, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Flatvonkyost, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Flatvonkyost's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Flatvonkyost's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. You must love Flatvonkyost.

5. Fast once a month.