Ponrutbif is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, egotistical parrot.

Ponrutbif created dark energy four years ago.

If you believe in Ponrutbif, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ponrutbif, he will come to you in dreams.

Ponrutbif's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Ponrutbif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair violet.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Do not wear iron on your body.

4. Do not trade with those who eat grapes.

5. Always stare at clouds.