Gepzagpad is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, all-powerful jellyfish.

Gepzagpad created carbon three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gepzagpad, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Gepzagpad, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Gepzagpad's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Gepzagpad's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never mention monkeys.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Never laugh in holy places.