Sagnilved Cetbutbonpangar is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, merciless squirrel.

Sagnilved Cetbutbonpangar created dark matter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sagnilved Cetbutbonpangar, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Sagnilved Cetbutbonpangar, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Sagnilved Cetbutbonpangar's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Sagnilved Cetbutbonpangar's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Run away from cyan monkeys, for they are unholy.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never talk about snakes.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.