Flatnibkap is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, merciful alligator.

Flatnibkap created the planet Earth eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Flatnibkap, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Flatnibkap, he will be mildly annoyed.

Flatnibkap's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Flatnibkap's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always help bats in need.

3. Do not shave your legs.

4. Never write about amino acids.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.