Weejoplad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, strong badger.

Weejoplad created a top quark two years ago.

If you believe in Weejoplad, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Weejoplad, it will jump up and down on your head.

Weejoplad's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Weejoplad's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Weejoplad.

4. Always help ants.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.