Hadsanlarp is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, unfair penguin.

Hadsanlarp created matter eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadsanlarp, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Hadsanlarp, it will try to impress you with rainbows.

Hadsanlarp's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Hadsanlarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about capybaras.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Hadsanlarp must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Always help sick porpoises.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.