Jatstikbarn is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, weak guinea pig.

Jatstikbarn created the Sol system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Jatstikbarn, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Jatstikbarn, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Jatstikbarn's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Jatstikbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear boots.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never wear violet hats.

5. Do not chop down trees.