Quaghakhit is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, humane octopus.

Quaghakhit created the Sun nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quaghakhit, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Quaghakhit, she will turn you into a hamster.

Quaghakhit's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Quaghakhit's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Never sit in the presence of great tits.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not make images of living things.