Farnpangmis is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, deceitful ferret.

Farnpangmis created the Sombrero Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Farnpangmis, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Farnpangmis, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Farnpangmis' most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Farnpangmis' Holy Commandments

1. You must love Farnpangmis.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Farnpangmis.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Farnpangmis.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.