Bophigster is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, ruthless meerkat.

Bophigster created viruses five million years ago.

If you believe in Bophigster, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bophigster, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Bophigster's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Bophigster's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large lead sculpture of Bophigster on top of all buildings.

2. Do not speak about pineapples.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bophigster.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Bophigster loves bats, so they must be respected.