Cisshabtom Ladnatnilzan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, astonishing tapir.

Cisshabtom Ladnatnilzan created the Sombrero Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cisshabtom Ladnatnilzan, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Cisshabtom Ladnatnilzan, it will turn you into a sheep.

Cisshabtom Ladnatnilzan's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Cisshabtom Ladnatnilzan's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your feet gray.

2. Never look at stars.

3. Do not dye your hair black.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.