Dubnatpak is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, overgenerous bear.

Dubnatpak created the cosmos two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dubnatpak, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Dubnatpak, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Dubnatpak's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Dubnatpak's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate moths.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always make sure there are no great tits in a building before entering it.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.